Friends, I have a secret to share with y’all, one that I’m a little hesitant to do, yet we’re in a circle of trust, right? Well, here goes…
Tomorrow is my birthday.
There, I said it.
Birthdays are a tricky business for me. I don’t mind the fact that I’m a year older, that’s not the problem here. It’s all the attention: the full-volume singing, the awkward stare down as I’m forced to open gifts in front of others, the forced sense of importance and high expectations forced upon the day. It's like New Year's Eve, but I am the reason for the hoopla...yikes.
Over the past few years, I realize I do want my birthday acknowledged. Ignoring it entirely would be a tad hurtful. But I hate having a big to-do made on my behalf.
When I got to thinking about making myself some type of paleo-friendly birthday treat, like a gluten-free carrot cake or flourless chocolate tart, I realized I would be the one who would have to 86% of it…not really helpful when you’re working on toning up the mom bod.
That’s when it struck me- what if I could make a cake-flavored treat that was bite-sized, nutrient-loaded, and didn’t have to be consumed in one sitting?
Yup, that's how today's recipe came about...I whipped up my own birthday cake protein bites.
All the magical excitement and sprinkles and buttery vanilla goodness of birthday cake sans the awkward singing and staring that often accompany the confection.
Birthday cake protein bites…happy birthday to me, indeed.
As a child of the late 80s, I grew up in the Funfetti era. From Betty Crocker’s class Funfetti cake mix and Dunkaroo’s, I was no stranger to adoring the flavors of butter, vanilla, and sprinkles.
On Friday nights in high school, my friends and I would bake entire Funfetti cakes just for kicks, usually eating half the batter thus sacrificing the size of our cake…a worthy sacrifice indeed.
And yes, my friends and I were cool...while other kids were out experimenting with alcohol and other adult tomfoolery that high schoolers didn't need to be getting into, we were dressing up in retro clothes, hopped up on Diet Coke watching Disney movies and baking. And you know what? We remain cool to this day, thank you very much.
So when it came time to devise my birthday treat this year that wouldn’t put back all the baby weight I’ve lost thus far, I knew I wanted something that was pretty clean and would actually fuel my body instead of sending it on a blood sugar roller coaster. And, it needed to be gluten-free, too. I'm on the dairy train, but I don't mess with gluten.
Here’s how simple these are, my friends. Cause remember, I have a 2 month old. I don’t have time for the sifting and whisking and tempering that comes with making most birthday cakes. You’re going to need a few paleo pantry staples and about 5 minutes of time...you could whip these up between commercials of the Today show...
1) Coconut flour
2) Coconut butter (oh, you don’t have any? Check out Tuesday’s post on how easy and affordable it is to make your own)
3) Nondairy milk (I used unsweetened vanilla almond, but you could use coconut or cashew, too)
3) Dash of salt, vanilla AND butter extract (adds that cake batter flavor)
4) Protein powder- While any old vanilla would get the job done, I HIGHLY recommend my new favorite- Quest’s Salted Caramel Whey Protein Powder.
O.M.G., friends, it is the tastiest protein powder I have ever consumed, and that’s comin’ from a lady who has tried A LOT of protein powders over the years. No chalkiness, no bitterness, and slightly sweetened with stevia and a little sucralose. I don’t notice a strong taste from these sweeteners, which sometimes can be overpowering. Should this be something you consume as your 3 meals a day? No, I always recommend whole foods first; nonetheless, I see no problem consuming these sweeteners occasionally, especially in place of eating actual cake.
5) Optional Mix-ins like sprinkles, coconut flakes, pistachios, freeze-fried strawberries, lemon zest, or dark chocolate chips
Toss all of these ingredients in a bowl, add more nondairy milk if it’s too dry, add more protein powder if it’s too wet, roll the dough into bite-sized balls (mine were more like three-biters), and store them in your refrigerator until you are ready to nosh. And they’ll last there for 10-14 days, though I doubt they’ll last that long.
No need to wait until your own birthday to enjoy these birthday cake protein bites. Your birthday is coming up, after all. Sure it may be in a few weeks, or months, or half a year away. Still, we can celebrate your birthday a little early this year.
Happy birthday to you, indeed!
Healthy Happy Texan
I'm a Foodie, Fitness Instructor, and Follower of Christ. Add a passion for teaching others, dark chocolate, bacon, and dogs -- and that's me in a box.
Come on, let's live a little!